why are YOU mad?

   So recently a Buzzfeed video came out about if black people said to white people what white people say to black people. (still with me?) I watched the video and thought it was hilarious! Reading through the comments it was clear I was one of few who did. There was an abundance of anger from white people, saying the video was racist and race baiting... Interesting.

It's interesting that a video, made to tell the experiences of others in a comedic way, was turned around to be made a vicious attack on white people. 

It's interesting (and sad) that people have made themselves the victim when others have lifelong experiences of the examples given. It's also interesting how easy people are able to jump into the victim role by turning something about others into something all about them. Just goes to show how truly self centered some people are.

Allow me to open your eyes as to why the examples in the video are so silly:

• When you tell me I talk like a white girl/guy, you're telling me that you have made the assumption that all black people can only speak one way and that way is unintelligible. (hardly the case)

• When you tell me I'm whiter than you because I don't listen to such and such rap artist, you're telling me that you believe all black people listen to rap and rap only, and to listen to anything else is just unheard of.

I could go on, but I think you get the point. If you feel that this information being pointed out to you in a light hearted way is racist... Then you must be mad at all the people who think this way because otherwise it makes no sense. When we hear these things, most likely we don't get upset, we laugh it off because well.. We expect it. This is how we are represented in mainstream media.

We are "expected" to act a certain way and do certain things and any stray away from the stereotype all of a sudden makes us a different race, how telling. 

Nobody is thinking that ALL white people say these things, but I'm willing to believe that most of the people who haven't actually said it, have at least thought it. Here's the thing, though.... It's NOT A BIG DEAL! Seriously, how dare people get offended by something that we have dealt with for so long and are rarely even bothered by it most of the time. Take this video and take from it what it is giving you, another outlook. Open your mind and see outside of your bubble.

 It's NOT always about YOU. 

Some of the comments I read, people were disgusted because they felt that the video was generalizing the entire white population... Really? That's actually what the examples are proving from the other side. Black people are not just an ongoing rap video, we're not all drug dealers, we're not all on welfare, we don't all listen to rap, we live amongst you doing pretty much the same things you do, but unfortunately we are not given as much credit. 

At this point in my life, I have been called a white girl, asked about my "nappy" hair, been told I sound nothing like the voice on the phone and how surprising I am black, been told how "articulate" I am, been called uppity, etc., more times than I like, but that's life, that's how it goes and all I can do is laugh it off. Could you imagine what I would be called if I got offended?!  Is our community represented diversely in media... not so much, and because of that we do have specific stations and websites and such dedicated solely to us, because we DO want to be represented as more than just the stereotyped norm. Why is that wrong?

Stop letting anger be the first emotion to take over when you're confronted by something you don't understand. That goes for everybody. Try understanding, empathy, at least curiosity. I considered the video to be a funny joke, but after going through the comments, I realize it can be used for so much more if people allow themselves to open their minds about it instead of automatically be offended. 

Have a seat and breathe. Everything will hopefully be OK.... hopefully. Don't expect me to be your stereotype, I won't do it to you.

Thoughts on this, let me hear from you in the comments!

D W B

   I recently upgraded my old Honda civic to a brand spanking new Dodge Durango.  I have driven this truck to and from work everyday since then as well as other places, but I had an experience that I had only heard about or witnessed from the sidelines up until then.  On one particularly non special morning I was driving to work.  It was very early in the morning, before seven.

    I drove the same route I always drive in the same hurried fashion that I keep trying to break myself of, all while talking to my fiancé on my cool new car blue tooth function.  Driving down the road going 5, possibly 10 miles over the speed limit (not sure because I always get the speed limit wrong by like 5 miles on that road since it's usually a caravan of people driving in a giant cluster).  On this particular morning I happened to be pretty much alone going down the street when I could see the light turning yellow.  I started slowing down and as I got closer to the light I noticed a cop car to the right, kinda hiding behind some large trees.  By the time I was able to see him I was going pretty slow in order to stop at the light.  I passed him and I stopped very shortly afterwards at the light.  After a few moments he pulled out behind me.

   I didn't think anything of it, but then the light turned green and his lights started flashing!  I couldn't believe I was getting pulled over!  I knew I hadn't done anything wrong so I waited for him to walk up to my window with my fiancé patiently waiting as well on the bluetooth.  The officer reached my window and the first question out of his mouth was: "is this your car?"  It was such an unexpected question that I actually had to think about it for a second.  I told him yes of course this is my car!  After a bit of back and forth about what speed I was going (he didn't even know the speed limit either), I eventually have him the information he requested.  I watched him take my paperwork and license to the back of my car and join 2 other cops who were suddenly back there.

   As my fiancé and I began talking about what happened I kept my eyes on the gaggle of hens in my rearview mirror.  We discussed how ridiculous it was for him to ask me that and I began getting extremely irritated as the reality of the situation began to sink in.  My irritation grew to anger as I watched the 3 cluckers stand behind me laughing and talking while wasting my time in the process.  With my anger came assumptions as to what was so funny to the 3 white officers who obviously racial profiled me and were now probably making racist jokes at my expense.  The cop finally came back, handed me my information and told me snottily to watch my speed and something else I think,  I was still preoccupied by what had just happened.  My fiancé says I should have gotten his badge number but I explained that I was in too much shock to even think of that.

    That experience was a first for me as far as directly in my face type of racism that I noticed. I've heard stories about people being racially profiled,  but never actually had it happen until then.  It was a reality check of epic proportions about the underlined feelings that are still prevalent today.  I know the situation could have been worse and I thank God it wasn't,  but I will never forget the events of that day. It reminds me of that song by Kanye West, All Falls Down: "Even if you're in a Benz, you're still a nigger in a coupe."
 

It's For Your Benefit, Really.....

So a friend and I were having a conversation about watching slavery movies with white people, if I would watch one with her.  I hadda stop and think about this for a moment..... The conclusion I came to was that is not a situation I would want to be in.  I don't think that would be comfortable AT ALL.  I am ashamed to admit that I am just now catching up on the movies that show how my ancestors have been treated throughout history, like Rosewood, Ghosts of Mississippi, Malcolm X, and such.  I still have yet to see Roots and Amistad.  I never wanted to watch these movies in the past because I knew how horrible, saddening, and depressing they would be. 

  It's a hard pill to swallow to think that years ago, my ancestors were lynched, beaten, burned, raped,  tortured and other horrible acts... simply because people of a different skin color deemed them less than human because of the difference of that skin color.  My ancestors were not judged by their acts, but by the color of their skin.  They were treated worse than animals... human beings thought less of than dogs, simply because their skin was different.  The beautiful, NATURAL, brown skin they were born with elicited hate so strong that they were killed for it.  That just amazes, bewilders, angers, saddens, and angers me so much.  Yes I said anger twice because it is upsetting to an unknown degree. 

  Granted I do not hold anyone accountable for mistakes of the past, I do not hate white people for what was done back then, nor do I expect them to apologize or attempt to make amends for it.  This does not mean that feelings of anger do not come full force while watching such emotional movies, though.  In an attempt to be honest with myself as well as others, I personally do not think I would feel comfortable in that type of setting.  I would also not be comfortable watching Schindler's list with white people either or going to a Paul Mooney show with them.  There are just certain situations that can and should be avoided in my opinion.  This also avoids the possibility of the wrong thing being said or taken wrong during these situations.

  Of course I know someone is going to say that we should be able to be comfortable in any situation no matter what the color of our skin is collectively, but I'm just being honest as a human being and even I am not perfect.  What do you think?

Unbelievable....

  I am so sickened and disgusted by what has been up in the air the past couple of days, I think my fingers have a mind of their own right now.  I heard about this disgusting display from somewhere a couple of days ago, but thanks to the Twittersphere, this nightmare has been confirmed.  Shawty Lo, a rapper from Atlanta who has 1 maybe 2 hits to my knowledge has signed a contract deal with the Oxygen Network to expose just how classy he is, called 'All My Babies' Mamas'.  This is not the first "reality" show to show people in a negative light, especially not black people and I cannot for the life of me understand why.  Why would anyone want to invite a television crew into their lives to show the world just how pitiful you can be.  I say can be, because I absolutely refuse to believe that these people would act like this if there was not a camera in their face 24/7.  I personally do not watch "reality" shows, but unfortunately I cannot escape the advertisements and weekly wrap up conversations by co-workers or friends, facebook, or what have you.  The commercials that they show on TV for this garbage is sad enough, displays of women screaming at each other for no other reason than to get attention, women being openly loose to garner attention, women so drunk that they can barely walk down the street while clutching at their barely there clothes....

  Please do not misunderstand that I can appreciate that whatever people do in the privacy of their own homes within their own lives is their business and it is not my right to judge anyone regarding their actions, as I am far from perfect myself.  But it is quite a different story when one chooses to display their behaviors on national TV, then it is open play, all bets are off.  How can we get upset with rappers and music videos when women themselves are parading themselves around in this fashion?  How do we begin to teach our daughters  about class, being a real woman, respect, the list goes on and on.  It is especially damning when it is the ultimate low, the minstrel show to end all minstrel shows... a man with little to no success in life whatsoever, creating almost a dozen children with different women, and then there are the actual "baby mamas" who keep indulging these men by continuing to pro create with them?

  What is going on in the black community?  Why is this ok with people?  It is truly disgusting and stomach wrenching to know that this is being publicized.  I am shocked that this is on Oxygen and not BET, MTV, or VH1, considering those are the biggest contributors to the modern minstrel show.  What's funny is that while reading this story at: Newsone, there is a slideshow on the page and in the last box, there is a graphic of a fight starting to escalate on a couch, with the caption: 10 Best Ratchet Reality TV Moments of 2012.  I suppose the site gives some responsible information while never neglecting what will really capture most of our society's attention.  Puppet masters like Oxygen, BET, etc, are the reason why I will be starting a foundation, we cannot afford to lose our young women to the entertainment industry.


  The chains must be broken and we must make a conscience decision that no matter how horribly we are represented by the media, we will overcome them and prove that we are above the labeling of Hollywood.  We cannot allow multi-million dollar companies to look down on our youth and make decisions for them, under the assumption that they are too stupid to understand how they are being manipulated.  It has begun though, as the Newsone site shows, petitions have been formed regarding this isolated grossness (how sad that it has to come to that), but there is still so much work to be done.  As disgusting as this whole one situation is, I refuse to let it damper my spirits or doubt what I know to be true, which is that our youth are not lost, they are more capable than what they are given credit for.  We have to be more diligent as a whole and I can't wait to begin, so do your worst Hollydud...we will win in the end.