I got into a discussion at work awhile ago regarding the influences we play and should play in our children's lives. Me, personally, am old school. I tend to lean more towards the parenting ways of my mother and hers before, etc.. That includes Do as I say, not as I do. The debate that started was that I was pretty much the only one with that viewpoint, just about everybody else was very much on the side of do as I do. The reasons for this stance is very understandable, children will watch and want to imitate those that they are influenced the most by, so therefore it is the parent's job to set a good example in all that they do. I was raised a bit differently, we were told to do as our parents and elders said, not what they do and this makes the most sense to me, here is why:
Our jobs as parents is to lead and teach our children,give them the tools to succeed, teach them to be leaders and do good in life. Our jobs as parents are to be the adults while they are the children, it is not ok to let our children curse, be subjected to violence or feel threatened. It is not ok to allow our children to disrespect us or other people or do as they please whenever they want. It is our job as parents to be adults and let them be children, to establish that we as parents make the rules and children are to follow them accordingly. It is our job as parents to draw the line for our children and make sure that they know and understand that line. Being the parent, I will not allow my child to curse because they happen to hear me curse. I will not tolerate my child telling me that I am invading their space or infringing on their privacy, because they are children and they don't need privacy, as the parent I need to know what is going on.
As a parent I feel that it is my job to do what is best for the children I gave birth to, because that is the responsibility I took on when I got pregnant and I take that job extremely personal. I don't care if my children hate me, that is none of my concern. What is my concern is making sure that they are safe, healthy, educated, and prepared for the world around them. I don't expect my child to tell me that they did something and it should be ok, because I did it when I was young. You did it so I should be able to do it does not fly in the real world and it will definitely not fly in my household. Have your own mind, be your own person, and take the knowledge and tools I am providing you to make that happen. Am I a hypocrite? When it comes to raising a child....basically anyone else's opinion is null and void? What do you think?